I'm glad you came too

    This song is my guilty pleasure. Even though I don't usually like any boy band (more like group) other than *NSYNC and Backstreet Boys, I kinda like The Wanted. The lyrics are kinda stupid (every time he says "My universe will never be the same" I always think he's saying "My uni-brow will never be the same") and it sounds like every other song on the radio, but these guys are pretty damn hot! And they have accents!

Justin Bieber wants to be my boyfriend? I think I'll pass!

Wow! Puberty has hit Justin Bieber. When I first heard this, I was surprised that it was him. Nevertheless, its still Justin Bieber and I still hate the song. What the hell does "Swag Swag on you" mean? If its anything like what I'm thinking, I would deem this song inappropriate for children. Who would want to eat fondue next to a fire? So he wants me to burn my tongue and then my hand? Ummmm... I don't think so! Next!

Call Me Maybe-Not!!!

I loathe this song, so I'm gonna blog about it. I saw the video for it and I was repulsed by most of it. Who the hell enjoys that crap?
I couldn't help but notice:

• How old is this b***h? She sounds like shes my age but can pass for 30.
• There is no way a band is really playing. I hear no guitars! Just Autotune and a synthesizer.
• Who washes their car in high heels? 
• I can notice a hot guy from the next but dear Lord, its not worth fainting.
• The girl's face at the end was priceless. 

Hot Problems?

 This made me laugh...bad singing and horrible lyrics.... I can think of about 20 girls who would agree with the lyrics.

I'm not a princess, this ain't a fairy tale

     It happened. It too no less than 1 minute and it was enough to bring my entire day down. I told him and he smiled and said that I'm a sweet girl. But all I really want to do right now is cry. And it sucks because I don't even know why. I wasn't expecting him to tell me that he liked me back. But I sure as hell didn't expect that. I know I should be happy, but I'm not. Its like being stuck on an island and when a helicopter lets it ladder down and the second you reach for it, the rope's pulled away. I knew this was a bad idea and I still went for it. Even though I wanted to seal my own fate, I'm still disappointed. What's worse is that I have to see him one last time. It's going to be very awkward. I'm so happy that I have an awards ceremony.
     In a way, I'm glad I'll never see him again. I'm glad, I'll never know who he told and what his true reaction was. I mean,he could have been smiling on the outside and shuddering on the inside for all I know. I guess the saying "Out of sight, out of mind." is true. Hopefully, I 'll never see him and forget about his existence in the first place.
     When it first happened, I was like "Wow, Sara, you did it!" After a couple of minutes, then it sunk in- I was just flat out rejected. Not that I have never faced rejection before. It was just different this time. It sounded nice and sweet but with though I was able to remember that rejection is rejection, whether its blunt and crass or poetic and sugar-coated. I'm so sick of being rejected by people. I hate being so goddamned vulnerable. I know its bad, but what if things were different. What if I were pretty? What if I were popular? What if I thin? Things would have gone extremely different. I might have gotten his number, or at least a hug. I like to try to think where "being me" has gotten me. Good grades and nice friends. That's it. I'm not trying to be ungrateful (I value both of these things), but that's not getting me anywhere. I've heard of a bunch of guys that have graduated at the top of their classes and had friends but still amount to nothing. I want more. I don't want to be vulnerable. As mean as this sounds, I'd rather be the rejector than the rejected. I want to put myself in the position of never being hurt again. I want to change.

D-Day

     Well, tomorrow's D-Day. The day I tell AJ how I feel. God, I'm scared. This can one of two ways:
1) I tell him how I feel and he makes an awkward face and says "Oh, sorry... I don't feel the same about you" (99.99999% likely)
2) I tell him how I feel and he says "Oh, great! I do too!" (Not that I really believe this is going to happen) (0.000001% likely)
But today I was thinking...... Maybe instead of saying that I like him, I should just say that even though I didn't get to know him, we would have made really good friends because we generally have the same interests. Which is true. You never know, maybe we can become friends (1% likely) . Or maybe he'll just forget about me (99% likely). The only problem with this is that he doesn't know that I like him. Or maybe I'll do a mix of both. I can tell him that I like him and include that I know he doesn't feel the same way too, but then quickly add that it's only because he reminds me of an old friend. (I mean, that's loosely true, but I don't lay it on too thick.) I'm kinda scared to do it. Because of his finals, I have to do it a day early. Which means that I will have to face him the next day. Which will be awkward. But only for a half hour, which I will try to spend out of class.What really scares me is if he goes around telling all of his friends what I did. Mick made a good point at lunch: "He hangs out with dicks but he isn't one." I hope he's right. Wish me luck. I'll need it.


PS. I promise to blog about it after it happens, good or bad.

Unhelpful Highschool Teacher Memes.

My pre-Calc teacher



Pisses me of every time.





Coach Loompa

                                         


I think I've heard my AP World History say this numerous times.



Talkin' bout my generation.

     Every time I hear those word, I think of Bob Saget singing that on Full House many years ago. (random but so true)
     I hate my generation. I hate the people (for the most part), the movies, and especially the music.  I am a part of the supposed "Generation Y" before Z, but after X. The biggest problem I have with people are their mindsets. I loathe the fact that everyone in my generation (myself included once in a blue moon) feels as if they are entitled to something. I hate hearing things like "I'm 16, I need a car." Maybe its jealousy because my family doesn't have $15,000 to kill on an ungrateful spoiled brat. When a relative dies, nowadays, no one says "I miss grandpa.", instead we're more likely to hear "Who'd he leave the money to?" That pisses me off. One, because I don't have a rich grandpa and two, because when people my age think of death, they think of it like some god damned paycheck. Being so-and-so's relative doesn't make you entitled to a paycheck. Another problem I have with my generation is their sense of invincibility. People my age think they can do whatever they want, whenever they want, and nothing is ever going to happen to them. In school, I always hear stupid kids bragging "Dude, I drank like four beers and I drove perfectly!" Sometimes, I want to say "Is that what you're gonna say to the family of the person you killed?" The guy was going on like he should get an AWARD for driving drunk (there goes that entitlement again) and about how much he loved the saying YOLO, another atrocity to my generation.
     In all honesty, I don't like most of the movies that "my generation" has put out. I feel as if there are no original movies anymore. Screenwriters no longer "think" of story lines. This year, a vast majority of movies that have come out have either been prequels, sequels, or remakes of previous films. Even though I'm not a fan of the former, Harry Potter and The Hunger Games were the only original films I can think of.
     I love music, don't get me wrong, but I really don't like my generation's music. Like in the movie industry, everyone lacks creativity. For instance, a couple of years ago, no one had a clue who the hell David Guetta was. Then one loser started listening to him music and now basically all of the music on Y100 (a radio station in my area) sounds like a David Guetta song. All of the singers sound the same too. The biggest atrocity to hit the music industry is Nicki Minaj. I hate her with a passion. As a fellow African American female, I can't help but feel ashamed of her. She puts all of us to shame. Correct me if I'm wrong (which I'm not). Her lyrics are stupid, those accents are annoying and distracts a person of average IQ from changing the station, and most importantly, she exemplifies every negative black girl stereotype (ghetto clothes, changing weaves constantly, and having a bitchy attitude).
     Don't get me wrong there are good people in my generation (like me and my friends) but unfortunately, we are over shadowed by everyone else.
    And that my friends, are the reasons why my generation is on a bullet train to hell.

PE

      I have a love/hate relationship with PE. Sometimes I love it, just for the sake of being stuck in a room with AJ. Watching him do countless power cleans, bend over rows, and burpees.  I hate it mostly because of my coach and this creeper. Lets start with coach. I used to think he was okay, but now, I outright hate him. In all seriousness, he's a douche. He's like one of those bullies in high school that still haven't grown up. He instigates fights, talks to me like I'm mentally handicapped, and does absolutely NOTHING. He picks on these kids, Lips and Head, in my class. Even though both of these guys are mean to me and kind of deserve it, when the Coach is doing it, I know its inappropriate.  Both the real source of my hate is the creeper. We'll call him Example. Example is this substitute/coach at my school. He became a sub after being caught watching porn on a school TV as a teacher. I know that Douches become friends with other Douches. So needless to say, Example and Coach Loompa (first name Oompa) are good friends. And Coach lets Example walk into my class and do absolutely nothing. Which he does... Except when I'm in there. Everyday this week, Example has come into my class to stare and look at everyone...especially me. As a matter of fact, I'm the ONLY one he speaks to. Yesterday, I was next to the filing cabinet and cornered me to ask me if I worked out that day. If you know me, you know I don't work out, especially in that class. Even Stan, Jaime, and the Peanut Gallery think that he's after me. After months of feeling uncomfortable about this, I decided to go to my principal. I have to say, he's a nice guy. I told him about creeper and about Coach. I threw Coach under the but, but I don't give a crap.  He even said that Coach was on thin ice after his convo with one of my friends in another class. I hope both of their asses are fired. I always have shitty PE coaches. They're either sexist, bitchy, or Coach Loompa. I hate them all. How had is it to find a nice, encouraging PE teacher?

Chasing Pavements

    Chasing Pavements- Adele
I've made up my mind,
Don't need to think it over
If I'm wrong, I am right
Don't need to look no further,
This ain't lust
I know this is love
But, if I tell the world
I'll never say enough
'cause it was not said to you
And that's exactly what I need to do
If I end up with you

Should I give up,
Or should I just keep chasin' pavements?
Even if it leads nowhere
Or would it be a waste
Even if I knew my place
Should I leave it there
Should I give up,
Or should I just keep chasin' pavements
Even if it leads nowhere

 Things are really weird right now. I like AJ a lot but I don't like him at the same time. In short, he's not the guy I'd thought he's be. I used to think he was really sweet and caring but now, he's been a real jerk to some people. One day he's all sweet and I'm comfortable talking to him, and the next, he comes in with cornrows looking like he just got out of a hostage seige in the ghetto. What am I supposed to do on D-Day (the day I tell him that I like him)? When I first thought of the plan, it was fool proof because I thought he was a nice guy and he wouldn't be mean about it and make fun of me. But now, I'm scared. I'd rather him say "Sorry. I don't feel that way with you." than say nothing. Silence always kills me. 
     When I first realized that I liked him, I thought to myself "Sara, you know this isn't a good idea.It was like 7th grade all over again. It was this kid named Bryan. He was in 8th grade and I was in 7th... Never spoke a word to him yet I was head over heels obsessed with him. It was so bad that I had asked Kaitlin to print out his yearbook picture and I carried it wherever I went. Back to AJ. I hope I end up saying something to him. Part of me is kicking myself for liking him in the first place. It's really like I'm chasing pavements-a road that goes nowhere. Another part of me is saying, "Well, your life's going down one too...What have you got to lose?"
     Liking him has made me learn so much more about myself. In other words, I can be a jealous bitch. There's this tramp (not DT) in our Pre-Calc class and she's always throwing herself at him. I'm not saying I hate her, but lets just say if she were hit by a bus, I'd be driving that bus. (can't remember where I got that) But anyways, he takes the bait everytime. The way he smiles at her, asks her for help (mind you she's failing), and wraps his arm around her ignites a fire in the area that's supposed to be my heart. I can't help but think "That should be me."
    Its not like I didn't know I was gonna end up going down this road, but I wish it were a bit easier.